Sex and Drugs and Rock 'n' Roll at the Vancouver Olympics

As the Olympic torch made its way across Canada, one of the, er, running jokes in Vancouver was that the torch looked like a huge, poorly rolled joint. Wags were commenting that it was full of the famously strong "BC bud" that is grown in large quantities across this fecund province, and hence whereever it went people would chase it deliriously trying to catch a little puff.

Others have noticed the curious similarity between the sperm in Woody Allen's movie "Every Thing You Always Wanted to Know About Sex But Were Afraid to Ask" and the VANOC torch bearer costumes.

And his report on the Opening Ceremony, The Guardian's sports columnist Martin Kelner comments on his surprise at seeing what look like four giant ice todgers being raised in the middle of the show.

He writes: "Maybe we Brits, exposed to a lifetime of Benny Hill and Carry On have lost the charming innocence with which Canada is allegedly suffused, but you would have thought that someone in the army of choreographers, designers, and stage managers overseeing the production might have said at some point: "Sorry, but does that not look a bit like four huge todgers?"

As for rock 'n' roll - there are piles of rock stars in town, although there have been no reports of hotel rooms being trashed or televisions thrown out of windows.

People dressed in ninja outfits flinging newspaper boxes in shop windows, well, that's another thing.